Archive for the ‘Not South Carolina Specific’ Category

A too broad and too narrow definition of cheating

A few months ago, an attorney friend asking me if I’d ever “cheated” on my wife. Being a legalistic sort, I asked back, “what do you mean by cheating?” He didn’t think it was a question that needed clarification. In this culture, he’s right–which is a shame. A definition that considers all adultery cheating is […]

How fathers who gain custody can keep custody

For reasons having nothing to do with sexism, more mothers than fathers have custody of their children. Often when fathers get custody they have never had the role of equal or primary caretaker of their children. If they gained custody because the mother was unfit (and remains unfit) there is little risk of mother getting […]

Three recent books about the state of marriage

Both personal and professional curiosity have engendered a fascination with books about the sociology of marriage. Frustrated spouses come to me looking for a divorce but what they are really searching for is to feel peaceful again. Developing an understanding of marriage helps me help them achieve that goal. It also helps me navigate my […]

What you think, what you know, and what you can prove

One goes into a hearing or trial trying to establish various facts that will hopefully lead the court to rule in the desired manner. However the court is looking for “proof” of these facts. Merely alleging these facts exist is insufficient to convince a factfinder. One might think of three confidence levels in evidence: thinking […]

Falling into the tiger pit of prior consistent statements

About a decade ago I represented a pre-teen girl in a DSS abuse and neglect case in which she alleged her stepfather had sexually abused her. DSS became involved after she reported the abuse to a school counselor. At a pre-trial hearing, in an attempt to get the matter dismissed, the stepfather’s attorney had noted […]

The myth of the ironclad prenuptial agreement

Intolerable Cruelty, a lesser Coen Brothers movie, follows the courtship of an over-slick, high-powered divorce lawyer and a man-eating gold-digger, as they take turns getting over on the other. The plot’s Macguffin is the “Massey Pre-Nup,” an allegedly ironclad agreement that has never been successfully challenged. It is, obviously, a work of fiction. Most folks seeking […]

Best methods for equalizing physical custody

There are some custody cases that will only settle if both parties get equal time with the child(ren). Thus a sizable subset of custody cases settle with both parties getting at least 180 overnights a year. There are numerous ways one could theoretically create such a custody schedule but many of them are, frankly, stupid. […]

What do we mean by custody?

Parents come to my office wanting to litigate custody. Often they are not sure what it means but they know they want it. Terms like “sole custody,” “shared custody,” “joint custody,” and “primary custody” get mentioned and folks want to know what these terms mean. I really can’t answer. One reason I can’t answer is […]

 

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